Who do you think you are kidding....?

One of the shortest but best attended rides of the summer proved to be one of the most eventful.
Ten of us gathered in gloriious sunshine outside the Old Sun. Altough we were raring to go, departure was delyad by two punctures and yet another photoshoot for the new shirts. Sitting with his bike propped against the wall, waiting the for the restof us, Mick became the first victim of the puncture curse as his rear tyre exploded for no apparent reason. Next, Loren discovered his back tyre was flat. The resultant delay gave new recruit Nick (Casey) time to get home, change and join us on his very own Cannon Ball Express- a five-speed Peugeot classic.

After posing for Jay's Wonderwall we set off towards Potsgrove via Steppingley, Eversholt and Milton Bryan, with an enforced stop on Flitwick Road to pick up Casey's bike rack.

Potsgrove is the ancestral seat of the King-Johnson family and Joe always delights in regaling us with local history. Tonight he took us on a detour to see an old World War II radio station hidden in the woods off the gated road. As we variously rode, scooted and pushed our bikes across the field to find the station we looked like a shambolic scene from Dad's Army. In the absense of our very own Captain Mainwaring- on manouvres in Turkey- Corporal Jo(n)e(s) took charge, briefing us on the network of radio stations that were linked to Bletchley Park during the war, and the way in which they were guarded by the Home Guard, which included Joe's dad.
As we set off towards the main Woburn road a shot rang out at the back of the bunch- not a Fifth columnist but the sound of Casey's back tyre exploding in the heat. (They don't make tubes like they used to)
After another stop, protracted by the lack of quick release nuts on the Cannon Ball Express, we headed on to Woburn and picked up the road along the wall of the Woburn Estate. In an effort to make up ground on the front runners, the backmarkers cut the corner at the Old White Horse, picking up the old footpath. This seemed like a great idea until Joe hit a pot hole and, you guessed it, got another puncture.
The lead group carried on to the French Horn while the rest of us helped change the tyre before joining them for a much needed beer.
After years of masquerading as a poncy restaurant (in between closures) the French Horn is once again a pub, albeit up-market, and there was a decent selection of beers including Old Speckled Hen. I twas nice to sit out in the sun and shoot the breeze. However, prices are still aimed at the merchant bank brigade and we decided the kitty couldn't stand a second round so we headed off to the Old Sun for Adnam's and Paddy's chilli.

A staccato 20 miles but a fun evening despite the enforced stops.

Coming from Behind

Having been distracted by a variety of events, including three legged fancy dress beer races, music festivals and holidays, to say nothing of a new job, the blog has been somewhat neglected for the past couple of months. Indeed cycling has slipped down the pecking order of late making the slog up Sundon Hill the other week exceptionally hard.

Anyway, things seem to be settling down and I have twin mid-year resolutions:- to ride more (and get fit) and to keep the blog up to date.

There's no point in trying to backfill the last few weeks but there are a few events and non-events that warrant mention: -

• For the second year in succession and the third in total, Blunty has been training for L'Etape and as I type he is on his way to France to tackle another stage of the Tour De France (see post 17/7/09). Watch out for an up-date on his return.



• Two other members enjoyed a slightly less taxing ride in France and were careless enough to provide the photographic evidence.






• Our fittest member- Everton, has become our first pensioner having taken early retirement. Unfortunately for the rest of us, this means even more time for him to train/ride and he's fitter than ever. At least the 100 miles he did before joining us last week slowed him down a little.





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  Attending the opening of the new 170 mile Chiltern Cycleway, Mark the Fireman managed to get a picture of himself and his club shirt next to Mark Webber.

• We were denied the opportunity to defend the Ampthill Festival Boules crown as the competition was cancelled or deferred until later in the summer


• We finally got to hand over one of our new shirts to our proud sponsors- The Old Sun- see photo opposite
  
  
  
  
  
  

Ashes to Ashes- 15th April

Thursday's ride had a certain element of Ground Hog Day about it as we set off towards Deadman's Cross via Clophill and Great Lane. This was more to do with the wish to benefit from a strong north easterly breeze on our return journey than a lack of imagination on the part of the route planners.

It seems the threat of damage to their jet engines from volcanic dust clouds grounded a number of our colleagues (now we know what makes Everton so quick); nevertheless six of us (Brian, Chris, Loren, Mick, John & Blunty) braved the Icelandic fall-out and set off down Abbey Lane.

In a strange parallel to the previous week, we met some real cyclists on the outskirts of Haynes. This time they really were proper cyclists with full size bikes as well as matching lycra kit. (I know we have both, but our ale guts do provide quite a significant distinction). In a fit of bravado John and Chris set off in pursuit, pedalling flat out in a forlorn effort to reel them in. To be fair we managed to hold our own for all of 800 yds. Finally, realising this was a pointless exercise for which we would suffer later, we decided to let them go taking some solace from the fact that the combined ages of the three young upstarts was only about 2/3rds of our two.

At Appsley Corner we picked up a concrete bridleway which skirts Rowney Warren. Although this is usually reserved for our MTB rides, it's got a reasonable surface and did not present any problems to our skinny road tyres. Coming out at Chicksands, we turned left and headed back to Ampthill via Deadman's Cross and Limbersley Lane, enjoying a good boost from the wind on backs.

Despite the draw of the Stone Jug, we decided to head directly to Ampthill to try out the newly refurbised Albion Arms.

Now owned by Everards and operated by Banks & Taylor, the Albion has returned to it's former glory after many years in the doldrums. Real ales are it's speciality with some 10 hand pumps offering a rotating choice of guest beers alongside the staples of Everards Tiger and B&T's own brews. There are also several unusual lagers as well as a range of draft ciders, ranging from strong to rocket fuel.

The term " kids in a sweet shop" sprang to mind, made more appropriate by a preponderance of baggy cycling shorts, and it took about ten minutes to decide what to drink. Between us, we managed a pretty good cross section of the beers on display and nobody had a bad pint. ( I don't think I've ever said that about the Albion before!). One of the favourites was a straw coloured ale call GHB. Somebody pointed out that this sounds like a recently outlawed date-rape drug, but at 3.4% ABV I think you'd have to drink an awful lot before succumbing to Mick's charms.

After a couple of rounds we headed back to the Old Sun which, despite the attractions of the Albion was remarkably busy. As ever, the Bombardier, Adnams and Tribute were all in great nick.

20 miles and an excellent evening.

Fish on a Bike- 8th April 2010

In the words of the late great George Harrison - "It's been a long cold lonely winter" and it was great to ride out in bright sunshine for the start of our first road ride of the year.

It doesn't seem five minutes since we were staggering home from the Old Sun after our Xmas ride. Perhaps that's because I've staggered home form the Old Sun on several other occasions since then or simply that time really does go quicker as we get older. Whatever the reason, the start of the new season seems to have leaped upon us and this may explain why we were a bit low on numbers; Brian, Chris H, Loren and, for the first half, Everton making up the crew.

Like a premier league football club, we have new kit and shirt sponsors for the season (thanks to the guys at the Old Sun). This may be the only similarity we have with elite sportsmen but I have to say we looked very smart as we set out down Oliver Street; Loren looking extra smart on his new bike.

Tradionally, the first ride of the year has been a very short slog up Limbersley Lane, round Haynes and back via Clophill, but the sunshine spurred us on to be more adventurous and we headed out to Dead Man's Cross and Haynes Silver End. Thanks to Everton and a brisk tailwind we kept a decent pace on the way out, even up Great Lane.

In truth, the ride was pretty un-eventful but it was just nice to be out. Coming back towards Haynes we spotted some "real" cyclists in the distance and set off in pursuit. It felt great to reel them in and pass them on the climb up towards Church End, but the shine was taken off our achievement when we realised they were riding foldable bikes! They weren't quite Mini-Moultons, having 24" wheels and the riders were wearing lycra.

Everton left us at the top of Great Lane to go and do some real training with Bedford CC. More in keeping with the ethos of the club, the rest of us headed for the Stone Jug.

It was very tempting to stay for a second pint of Old Cobbler but we decided discretion was the better part of valour and returned to the Old Sun. As expected, the temperature dropped dramatically as soon as the sun went down and it was a chilly ride back to Ampthill; some may have regreted wearing shorts.

The Old Sun was busy and the Bombardier, Adnams and Tribute were all in tip top condition.

I was given a freshly caught trout by one of the regulars which prompted a pub-wide discussion on the best way to gut, clean and cook it. Not surprisingly, there were nearly as many receipes as customers. Against the odds, I did remember to take the fish out of my bag and put it in the fridge when I got home ( I baked it with lemon and tarragon for Friday's tea if anybody's interested).

All in all, a very satisfying start to the season, just about clocking up 20 miles.

New Shirt Gets Airing in Cyprus Sun

While the rest of us have been slogging through mud and rain on the trails of Bedfordshire (or, in the case of many, vegging on the couch), Mark "The Fireman" Barter and his brother Simon have been doing some serious riding in the Cypriot sunshine whilst raising money for a local kidney charity.

In completing a six day, 323 KM ride around the island they've raised a fantastic E2887. Full details of the ride can be seen at http://www.look4usincyprus.com/ARC/ARC-index.html.

While there, the guys bumped into the German MTB team and Mark took the opportunity to model his new Ampthill shirt alongside Sabine Spitz, current world champion and Olympic medalist- (see opposite). No Mick- she won't be joining us next season!

All Dressed Up and Nowhere to Go

So after five or so years of discussion, debate and inaction by the majority, followed by a couple of months of intense activity by our chairman the new shirts have arrived, and very good they are too. Well done Brian for making this happen- Hopefully by the time this reaches the net everybody will have stumped up the brass and will be proud owners of shiny new shirts.

Remarkably, it seems that just about everybody ordered the same size as they had last time. Now, I've been looking at some of the photos of past tours, Christmas meals etc and, unless these newfangled digital cameras distort the pictures, I think it's safe to say there's not a man amongst us (with the possible exception of Blunty) who' physique is not showing more signs of Beer than Bikes.
I'm no expert in these matters but I understand that American fashion houses make clothes bigger to kid their lardy-arsed middle-aged customers that, in the words of the Beautiful South, they're still a "perfect ten" . This makes them feel good and spend more. Fortunately it seems Endura have adopted a similar strategy and there's plenty of growing room in my new shirts- to allow for the odd pie along with the beer and banter next term. If this makes anybody feel so good they do have the urge to spend more, there are a couple of spare shirts available.

Now we just need it to stop raining or snowing for an hour or so so we can get out there and show them off.

Thanks Brian.

The Second Noel

For those who took part in the afternoon's ride, there was just time for a sh*t, shave and shower before dashing out for pre-dinner cocktails- well actually a couple of pints in the Old Sun. We're joined by CP, Blunty, Loren & Clive who is still decidedly jet-lagged. Taxis whisk us off to the Jolly Coopers where we meet Everton for a full house.

Xmas Dinner has been a feature of the club's calendar for some 12 years and has been the scene of some of our most memorable evenings. On one occaision Joe entertained the punters in the White Hart at Maulden with a table top hornpipe while singing "What Shall We Do With the Drunken Sailor" - the bar man's measured response was that the Drunken Cyclists should shut up, drink up and go home while they still can.

Another year, former member Pete Bach left a lock-in at a pub which shall remain nameless at around 1 am. Returning some30 mins later with a book of poetry, he began to recite sonnets while we fell about laughing. He was serious but I think it was the only time I can remember being paralysed with laughter.

For many years the Xmas dinner was linked to to a full day ride. We would stop for a beer ot two at lunch time and have several more on our return. Consequently, by the time we sat down to dine we were well oiled and by the end of the evening many were "tired and emotional" to say the least- This often led to a full and frank exchange of views about something petty like which pub we should meet at next summer and would end with one or more member spitting their dummy out.

Over the years we have mellowed somewhat. This is largely due to a reduction in alcohol consumption and an increased maturity (ho ho) but may also have something to do with a change in personell - some past members having the ability to pick a fight in a telephone box. Anyway, tonight there is just the right level of banter and disagreement to make things interesting- even if most of the topics of conversation are predictable-

• Let's go on tour to Belgium/France/Holland next year
• Brian resigning as Chairman (and then being re-instated)
• Who made all the noise when we went on tour to Norwich (12 years ago)
• Who were the original members
• Which pub will we meet at? (still)
• When will we get new shirts?

Next year we'll need to find at least two new topics as Brian has done a splendid job in organising new shirts and, as they are smothered with the Old Sun logo, it's pretty clear where we will be meeting.

Food, beer and service at the Jolly's were all top notch and it was nice to see that the 1980's style Page Three pin-ups in the gents have been replaced by more classy, up-to-date prints. (It took a while to work out why Mick spent so long in the lav).

Talking of Mick, it was good to see him awarded the pink Barby cycle helmet for being an outstanding arse- To be fair he took it well and wore it for the rest of the evening.

After coffee and mince pies it was back to the Old Sun where we bumped into our erstwhile Chairman and had the opportunity to rehearse some of the arguments of yesteryear.

A good end to a great year's bikes beer and banter.